I can't Believe I'm Telling you this

Charting a year in the life of three very different men dealing with prostate cancer, who have found strength and each other, online.

I can't Believe I'm Telling you this We live in a world where prostate cancer grips two thirds of men before the age of 80. Yet a culture of silence surrounds this uncomfortable disease. I Can't Believe I'm Telling You This charts a year in the life of three very different men dealing with prostate cancer, who have found strength and each other, online.

'Hi everyone, I've been diagnosed with prostate cancer and I'm feeling OK, if a bit nervous', Martin types into the YANA (You Are Not Alone) web forum for people dealing with prostate cancer. A professor of Archaeology with an inquisitive mind, Martin wanted to know as much as possible about his options. He approached the web 'not just for the scientific stuff..it's also the emotional and lifestyle stuff'. The risks of incontinence, impotency and erectile dysfunction are 'not easy to talk about with guys..on the internet I didn't feel like I was taking my clothes off in public'.

This embarrassment was what led prostate cancer to claim Horace's father's life. 'He was most upset when he found out that some of his friends had had the cancer and never said anything..by the time he went to the doctor it was too late.' When Horace himself was diagnosed his first thought was 'Oh my God I'm going to die.' But remembering his father's experience, he began talking about it with other men on the internet. 'It makes me feel better about the fact my PSA has got worse.'

For George, the internet led his doctors to reconsider a very bleak prognosis. 'It meant nothing to me but circled was the figure 182, it should have been no more than 4', he says. When the doctors said there was little hope, George turned to YANA. He discovered there were 'options', and demanded to see an Oncologist. 'He said 'yes, I think we can tackle this'' George recalls, 'the internet in my opinion, saved my life'. He has now found good friends as well as information through the web forum. Since beginning his hormone therapy, George's PSA has been steadily declining but he still feels the strain of the side-effects- 'tiredness still hits me badly every other week' George types into the forum.

At the end of the week Martin will have an operation to remove his prostate. He came to the decision after reading many other men's testimonies on YANA. But he admits that the limitless stream of information on the internet can be misleading: 'I thought that maybe an hours searching on Google', laughs Martin, 'and I'd discover that thing world class Urologists had missed'. But whether it's advice, new developments or simple solidarity the men are looking for, many doctors now don't see a conflict in the web. 'It's gone down. I feel quietly elated' says Horace, as he clutches his PSA results. Meanwhile Martin's operation is a complete success. 'I'm posting joyous news' George types 'After thirty months, no more hormone therapy. I'm terrified to type it.'

If the barriers to beating prostate cancer are as much social as they are scientific, 'I Can't Believe I'm Telling You This' is a powerful story of hope for the 200,000 men it affects every year.

Director: Mike Christie
FULL SYNOPSIS

The Producers

Having initially spent three years in television news at TV-am from the age of 19, Mike Christie thought he was abandoning television as a career when set up his own business working in the music and film industries in 1991. For over five years in the 90s, his business had enormous success for a broad range of clients including Suede, Pet Shop Boys, Walt Disney, and Derek Jarman. In 1998, Mike returned to television production as a director, bringing with him a unique style to documentary making. In the last decade he's collected a diverse set of directing credits including Jump London (C4), Little Britain Down Under (BBC1) and Wayne Rooney's Street Striker (Sky1)

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